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  #1  
Old 09-29-2019, 07:04 AM
FNHipowerluv FNHipowerluv is offline
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Gun companies summarized

I decided to make this for fun. It's mostly satire based on a little truth, so please don't get offended if you're a fan of any of these.

Beretta: You only hate us because we won the XM9 trials.

Browning: Have you seen our new T shirts, dog bowls, flat brim hats hoodies, or applied a Buckmark sticker to your lifted pickup truck? Oh yeah, I forgot, we make guns too.

Colt: The more you ask for it, the less likely we are to build it.

FN: We're like HK, but Belgian.

HK: We're not against civilians owning guns, just poor people owning guns.

Hi Point: Why spend $500 on a hand gun, when you can spend $300 on beer?

Mossberg: You didn't ask for a M4 stock on a lever action or a chainsaw grip shotgun, but we built it anyway.

Kel-Tec: When levels of innovation exceed levels of production.

Remington: We have more lemons than Minute Maid.

Ruger: We bring you the innovation of others at an affordable price.

Sig Sauer: German and Swiss heritage, with Indian quality.

S&W: We have the revolver market locked up.

Taurus: We heard you like to gamble.

Winchester: An American legend.....built in Japan.
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  #2  
Old 09-29-2019, 07:08 AM
callmegoose77 callmegoose77 is offline
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Funny and hurtie!
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  #3  
Old 09-29-2019, 07:38 AM
yeti yeti is offline
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Good stuff!
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  #4  
Old 09-29-2019, 07:54 AM
scubadad scubadad is offline
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You left out glock. Is that because they are perfect?
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  #5  
Old 09-29-2019, 08:01 AM
FNHipowerluv FNHipowerluv is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scubadad View Post
You left out glock. Is that because they are perfect?
Ah, forgive me. I knew something was missing.

Glock: So perfect, we've had to change it at least five times.
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  #6  
Old 09-29-2019, 08:21 AM
Plantar5 Plantar5 is offline
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Pretty funny for a Sunday morning...
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  #7  
Old 09-29-2019, 08:57 AM
FNISHR FNISHR is offline
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That's great.
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  #8  
Old 09-29-2019, 09:03 AM
L.E. L.E. is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FNHipowerluv View Post
Browning: Have you seen our new T shirts, dog bowls, flat brim hats hoodies, or applied a Buckmark sticker to your lifted pickup truck? What can we say? We've never really made any guns.
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  #9  
Old 09-29-2019, 09:14 AM
FNHipowerluv FNHipowerluv is offline
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Originally Posted by L.E. View Post
Well, they are technically an importer. "Miroku" just doesn't have the same ring to it.
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  #10  
Old 09-29-2019, 09:15 AM
RandyP RandyP is offline
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It's ONLY funny....cuz it's true! - LOL
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  #11  
Old 09-29-2019, 09:23 AM
Hawkeye fan Hawkeye fan is offline
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Nice.
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  #12  
Old 09-29-2019, 09:24 AM
Nitro.45 Nitro.45 is offline
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This is great!
Now I have to get my wife to take the damn pink Browning sticker off her car!!
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  #13  
Old 09-29-2019, 09:30 AM
Piranha451 Piranha451 is offline
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Those are true and funny!

Does anyone remember this one?

HK. Because you suck. And we hate you.

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  #14  
Old 09-29-2019, 10:03 AM
L.E. L.E. is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FNHipowerluv View Post
Well, they are technically an importer. "Miroku" just doesn't have the same ring to it.
Okay, so what was their excuse in the Fabrique Nationale days?

In all fairness, I'm sure someone at Browning was responsible for that ghastly gold trigger, though.
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  #15  
Old 09-29-2019, 10:12 AM
roblectric roblectric is offline
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Dan Wesson?
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  #16  
Old 09-29-2019, 10:18 AM
jtq jtq is offline
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Originally Posted by roblectric View Post
Dan Wesson?
Are you sure the gun industry figured out how to avoid stainless steel auto pistols galling in the 1980's? Was there a memo?
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  #17  
Old 09-29-2019, 10:26 AM
havanajim havanajim is offline
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Excellent. I'll throw another one in....

CZ: Meek and humble on the outside.... the Clark Kent of the gun world... albeit with an eastern European accent!!!

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  #18  
Old 09-29-2019, 10:41 AM
FNHipowerluv FNHipowerluv is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L.E. View Post
Okay, so what was their excuse in the Fabrique Nationale days?

In all fairness, I'm sure someone at Browning was responsible for that ghastly gold trigger, though.
To be fair, FNH does actually have a historical connection to John Browning, since he died on thier factory work bench. Miroku produced guns are a just result of rising Belgian labor prices.

I can tolerate the gold trigger, I just wish they'd quit putting the "Buckmark" on the trigger guard and reciever. Cheesy redneck emblems do not belong on fine shotguns.
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  #19  
Old 09-29-2019, 11:34 AM
SpringerXD SpringerXD is offline
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Springfield: We don't care if it's a can opener. We'll still put an ambi safety on it.
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  #20  
Old 09-29-2019, 11:49 AM
Vintage68 Vintage68 is offline
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Thanks! As a HK fanboy I can ruefully agree with this.
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  #21  
Old 09-29-2019, 11:50 AM
FNHipowerluv FNHipowerluv is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wanna Warthog View Post
Springfield: We don't care if it's a can opener. We'll still put an ambi safety on it.
My take on Springfield: Why develop a new handgun design, when you can import Croatia's finest?
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  #22  
Old 09-29-2019, 11:51 AM
gumbee gumbee is offline
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Very accurate satire!!!
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  #23  
Old 09-29-2019, 12:31 PM
Big Pete10 Big Pete10 is offline
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All too true!
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  #24  
Old 09-29-2019, 12:39 PM
cw410 cw410 is offline
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FN: Battle proven products, war on your wallet prices...
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  #25  
Old 09-29-2019, 01:01 PM
callmegoose77 callmegoose77 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wanna Warthog View Post
Springfield: We don't care if it's a can opener. We'll still put an ambi safety on it.
That sums up what Iíve never been able to put into words!!
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